| | Oh what the hell...I'm bored...I should be drawing something but instead I'm being retarded...*sigh* The sad fruit of Labor Day Weekend. I give you: Excerpt from What Happens When Sankoe Members Become Bored...Hey, say it like you care! *waves Pocky sticks*
<“Potter!” Maddy exclaimed.
“And Malfoy!” Yoko added with gusto.
“Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy!” the two cried in unison.
Much squealing ensued as the rest of their friends looked on in confusion.
Then, suddenly, catching the teenagers very much by surprise, a large creature hurled out of the bushes and struck both Maddy and Yoko to the ground. It appeared to be a girl, around the same age as the onlookers, who was dressed in a bizarre combination of clothing. Her brightly colored Spongebob Squarepants tie waved cheerfully as she proceeded to bear hug her two victims to asphyxiation.
“De…my!” Yoko said gleefully, or as gleefully as she could, being deprived of air and squashed to death.
The unexpected guest jumped up and began dancing. All eyes turned fearfully to the scene, which began to appear wildly unlikely and possibly hazardous to the health of innocent civilians. The author of this piece guffawed in a particularly unpleasant manner and happily continued typing.
“Oh my god! Yoko! Maddy!” He voice pitched from high to low like a siren. The others were highly alarmed.
“Demy!!!!!!” Maddy squealed, and a demonically joyful smile leapt to her face like a lion on a wildebeest. She then proceeded to hug this newcomer until her face began taking on a bluish tinge.
“Sankoe UNITE!!!” The three shrieked and squealed and talked and danced so rapidly that the others began to wilt from the force of the sweatdrops and face-faults dealt to them by the sadistic author.
This continued for a several minutes, until Demy realized the others standing in the doorway, looking as if they’d swallowed a particularly malodorous draught of the living dead. Then, the scene turned exquisitely disagreeable.
“DRACO!! And…HARRY!! Oh. My. GOD!!” Demy, of course, simply had to glomp Draco and Harry (who wouldn’t!), but she was met with a major roadblock. It was named: Draco Malfoy’s Largely Objectionable Stick Up His Ass (I mean for god’s sake, there’s no room for Harry! *pout*). The blond British bloke (*cackle*) quickly put an end to any glomping on Demy’s part, aided by his terribly sleek reflexes and lean, slender biceps the color of…(*cough*). Well, he bonked her. Very hard. And on the head too, you sicko perverts.
While Harry was trying to restrain Draco from bonking Demy any further, Becca, Nick, and Tony were wondering if this somehow was a particularly frightening dream rendition of The Wizard of Oz. It seemed highly unlikely, but then again, so did the scene unfolding before them.
The insanity, which was much aided by Sankoe’s ensuing efforts to glomp both boys, did not end until, not much to the surprise of the bystanders, two men walked up to the door. They were dressed in contrasting black and white, and everything seemed to hang still for a moment as the members of Sankoe got an eyeful of their godlike bishie-ness.
“SUBAAAARUUUUU!!!!!!!!” screamed Yoko.
“SEIIIIII-CHAAAAN!!!!!!!!” screamed Maddy.
Sadly, Demy was not able to join in on the screaming (and this could not have been good for her, as she began to puff up like a balloon with the force of keeping the words in) as she had somehow become squashed under Harry and Draco, who were now, bizarrely, making out on the doorstep and kneeing Demy in the face simultaneously. Far from being uncomfortable, though, the ardent yaoi fan scrambled away from Draco and Harry, quickly snapped a photo of the two boys kissing, and crowded around Seishirou and Subaru with the rest of Sankoe.
Subaru, looking slightly awkward, graciously spoke first. “We’re very sorry to just barge in like this, but it seems that we were scheduled to a battle here, on this kekkai. Please, would you kindly evacuate so as to prevent injury to yourself and your loved ones?”
Seishirou, being the sexy little badass he was, merely smirked in greeting and put an arm around Subaru’s waist. The three Sankoe members nearly melted with an instantly gratifying dosage of yaoi on the spot. The author, meanwhile, drooled pathetically as she typed this.
“Battle?? What the fuck are you talking about, man! Subaru-chan, Sei-chan, you’re welcome to the master bedroom, and that’s ALL!” Maddy cackled evilly as she said this, striking fear into the hearts of all bystanders (with the exception of Harry and Draco, who were much more intently focused on…other things).
“Or, if you like it kinky, you could try the kitchen! They have bar stools! Ohohohohoho!” Yoko threw her head back and laughed menacingly.
Subaru appeared queasily on the verge of a nosebleed, while Seishirou looked sincerely interested in the proposition.
“Really? And what…shape are these bar stools?” he inquired, sparking a spurt of blood from Subaru’s nose.
“Whooo, Sei-chan! I knew you’d like that, you perverted little bastard!” Demy managed in between maniacal giggles.
Suddenly, Demy whipped out a variety of indecently acquired sexual playthings. Everyone gasped and looked nauseous as blood flowed liberally from nostrils. Oblivious, she handed a large load to Seishirou, and then turned around and bestowed her gifts to the now-coherent (and very bloody) Harry Potter. Draco, oddly enough, looked wickedly fascinated.
This produced a sweatdrop even from Maddy and Yoko, but it quickly passed to elated anticipation and dirty, unsubtle grins.
Sankoe shared a moment as the three laughed depravedly in unison.
As if to herald the end of their copious chortling, another batch of bishies arrived, this time with a crash.
“You idiot! I told you we should’ve gotten directions before leaving Meifu!”
Three pairs of bishounen-tuned ears perked, and three pairs of dementedly happy eyes glinted. This was to be later known as The Prelude to a Most Fantastic Disaster Since the Time of Caveman Sex (coming soon to a theater near you).
“TSUZUKI!!!!”
“HISOKA!!!!”
“WATARI!!!!”
“TATSUMI!!!!”
“…..”
“MURRRAAAAAAAAAKKIIIIIIII!!!!!!”
Half the eastern wall and the lovely latticed veranda exploded in flames and wonderfully diverse sparks of color as the three attempted to glomp the newcomers. Chaos ensued as shikigami and shinigami and Tatsumi’s left shoe melted into a mushroom cloud of magnificent brilliance, which irrevocably led to the poignant demise of the front yard and its cheerfully unaware lawn gnomes.>
...to be continued...
*sob* I'm so sad.
Maddy |
| | Posted 9/1/2003 12:53 PM - 67 Views - 12 eProps - 8 comments
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